Our first night in Rwanda we stayed at a guest house in Kigali. Our very gracious hostess was quick to accommodate our group of ten and deal with our crazy jet lag. In the morning, Elsie provided us an excellent breakfast made from veggies from her own garden and eggs that were locally grown as well. Kayla, I have a new egg recipe for youJ! After breakfast, our driver was two hours late (the African way) so, Elsie and I began to visit. When I complemented her English, she began to share with me her story of the genocide.
She lost both parents and is excited to finally bury her father’s bones on August 20th. She only knows where he is buried because she asked his murderer. He directed her to a mass grace of 60 people. She also lost her brother and has helped to raise his daughter ever since. Her own family escaped to Scotland (where she learned English) to live for 6 and a half years. She had a two year old and was pregnant at the time they left. She had two other children born in Scotland. She said she lived as though she was dead for two years after she arrived. She was unable to sleep because of the nightmares and was terrified when she was awake. It was especially difficult for her in the dark winter months. However, people in Scotland helped get her the support she needed and loved her through the trauma.
She passionately shared that the only reason she is living is because of Jesus. She said that He gave His life to teach us forgiveness and that is what she chooses to do every day. Without forgiveness she says she would pass on the hate and death to her children and she refuses to do so. If she doesn’t forgive she will allow the cycle of hate to continue. Even as soon as a few weeks ago, the soccer stadium close to her house shot off fireworks after a soccer game. She and her husband were under their bed in a manner of seconds and crawling to get their children out of their rooms. She quickly called her best friend, who lost all five children and her husband in the genocide, and they were saying how they would see one another in heaven. They truly thought “the killers” had returned. She said they had a good laugh when they realized it was just fireworks!
When she returned to Rwanda, she said there were many widows and orphans just wandering the streets in the same state of mind from which she had been delivered. She and her husband started a ministry teaching the women how to sew and sell wares that they make. While sewing, they talk with the women (all widows of the genocide) and the women are finding healing as they share their stories with one another.
Elsie’s story is astounding. Listening to her share, I felt very ashamed that the US did nothing to help her and personally apologized. She quickly took my hand and assured me it was not my fault. It was a very precious moment. Her joy is contagious and she is very proud of the new country that has been built in Rwanda. The people here are beautiful and it is truly remarkable (not a big enough word) how they have chosen to forgive one another and rebuild a new nation.
You can support the widows group at enhitimana@yahoo.co.uk. Elsie and her husband sell organic essential oils and their website is www.ikirezi.com.
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